GAME OF THRONES The Children review - Warped Factor - Words in the Key of Geek.

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GAME OF THRONES The Children review

Did the Game of Thrones season 4 finale live up to expectations? Here's Raff's review of The Children.

So, usually, when I open my eyes on a Monday morning, I can’t get up fast enough so that I can watch the new episode of Game of Thrones with my breakfast. However, when my alarm went off this morning, I found myself staring aimlessly at my Star Wars poster.

I told myself that I was making a novel effort to count how many stars were actually in the image, when in reality, I was delaying the inevitable.

I knew that as soon as I pressed play on my Apple TV, it would be the beginning of the end, for this episode was the final episode of this season of Game of Thrones. I knew that once this episode was over, I no longer had any reason to get up on a Monday morning. Mondays suck anyway and my ‘the weekend is over’ rage is going to be unbearable.

If any of you happen to see me next Monday, then I am sorry. It is not going to be pretty. The only thing that was keeping me falling into despair when The Walking Dead finished, was that Game of Thrones was starting soon, well, now what?

Anyway, this week, I had the house to myself when I woke up, so I didn’t care that I was banned from eating Sugar Puffs when watching the TV, I did it anyway. I also had coffee, melon and some blackcurrant fruit pastilles. I am dreading when the others come home because I have been desperately trying to get mushed up melon and sugar puff out of the carpet all day. I did think to myself, I wonder how much trouble I could get into with melon, sugar puffs and fruit pastilles. Well, now we know. Alas, it was not my fault; it was Cersei Lannister’s fault!


The show opened this week with Jon Snow’s brave (or stupid) quest to meet up with Mance Rayder. I was really impressed with this scene because sometimes I forget that this story isn’t just about the goodies (Night’s Watch) and the baddies (The Wildlings). It is about them all being afraid of what is coming.

Mance had no sooner told Jon that they wanted the Wall to protect everyone, when Stannis Baratheon marched into the forest with a massive army to defeat all the Wildlings. I loved seeing the army come at the Wildlings from both sides. When this happened in the books, I wasn’t that enthusiastic about it all, but seeing it made me a lot more shocked in a way.

I also liked that Jon kept telling everyone to burn the dead and then Melisendre stared at Jon through the flames. It was almost like she was saying, “You know something, Jon Snow,” with her eyes (see what I did there?) Anyway, this is the scene that gave me goose bumps.

Now, this is the bit with my breakfast went for a burton! Cersai Lannister, had that weird doctor try and suck all the poison out of the Mountain, from the fight last week. He was using some weird machine and you could see all the blood and gunge flow through the tubes.

This is where I tried to stand up and reach for the remote, so I could fast forward through it. I forgot that all my breakfast was on my knee and now it is encrusted into the carpet. I knew I was in serious trouble but then Daenerys came on screen, so I just sat back down as if I was in a trance because I knew that I might be seeing dragons soon.

Daenerys Targaryan
So, at this point we see an old gentleman asking if he could be a slave again because he used to be a teacher and now he is homeless. I loved that she allowed him to go back to the slaver because, essentially, being free means that you have freewill. If he chooses to go back of his own accord, then she is not going to stop him. Very smart indeed.

She just makes them have a contract so that they can’t be enslaved for life, even though he will essentially be a slave again.

The next part nearly broke my heart. Drogon had killed a young girl, so Daenerys had to chain up the other two dragons so that they don’t hurt anyone else. This scene was so powerful that I almost forget the dragons were not her human children. As she walked out of the catacombs in tears, one tear rolled down my cheek and dropped in my coffee, which I was clutching because I didn’t want to it to end up like my sugar puffs – in a puddle at my feet.

Brandon Stark
This was my very favourite part of this episode. We see Bran, Hodor, Jojen and Meera finally get to the tree with the 3-eyed raven. They were just plodding along, minding their own business, they get to the final bit of land between them and the tree, when boom, all hell broke loose.

I definitely don’t remember this from the books, but a skeleton army came up from the ice and attacked them. It was amazing. The special effects were second to none.

Yes, you have guessed it, I stood up in shock and my coffee went everywhere. I didn’t even look away from the TV. How could I care about coffee when a skeleton army had stabbed Jojen, Bran had warged into Hodor and Summer was giving a whole new meaning to playing fetch with a skeleton army.

This is where ‘the children’ came in. They did remind me of a more evil Tinkerbell and they took Bran to the 3-eyed raven, which was really an old dude attached to some trees. He told Bran that he would never walk again and the poor lad’s face dropped, but then he said, “But, you will fly.” Bran’s eyes got their sparkle back. However, I think this is more about warging than Bran actually sprouting wings.

Brienne and Arya
Brienne and Pod wake up and find themselves face to face with Arya and The Hound. At one point, I thought Arya was going to put Brienne on her murder list and I wouldn’t have been having that.

What actually happened was the Brienne and The Hound had an epic fight, which ended with Brienne having a quick nibble on The Hound’s ear, and then Arya leaves him for dead. She robs him first of course.

Arya then finds her way, on her own to a port and with the magic words, “Valar Morghulis” she is on her way to Braavos. This also made me teary. I just kept thinking what a different story it would be if Arya went with Brienne.

Tywin and Tyrion Lannister
I have been waiting for this scene all season, and it was worth the wait. Jamie breaks Tyrion out of prison and shows him the way to get out of the castle. However, Tyrion takes a detour, which sees him walk in on Shae being in Tywin’s bed, so he kills her. She is more despicable than she was in the books. He does have tears in his eyes when he kills her though.

Tyrion then finds Tywin on the loo and he puts a few arrows in him after some harsh words are exchanged. I can’t think of a better way for that man. There is no honour in a loo death.

Varys then helps to smuggle Tyrion onto a boat bound for the free cities and at the last minute, decides to join him. And the episode is over, just like that.

I loved this episode, but I go agree with George R.R. Martin when he says that he wants the seasons to be longer. However, I do feel like some storylines have already caught up with the books.

Rating: 9/10

Is it next year yet?

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