PUPPET FIGHT 2: MUPPET FIGHT - Warped Factor - Words in the Key of Geek.

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Welcome back to the Puppet Wrestling Federation (PWF), where felts and furs meet in a no-holds-barred puppet battle royale. Today, the contestants are none other than four of Jim Henson's beloved Muppets: Kermit the Frog, Miss Piggy, Fozzie Bear, and Gonzo. They may be posing above as best friends, but these four furries are about to rip the living stuffing out of each other, and the crowd are well-up for the melee!

Our first contender, hopping into the spotlight, is the green and unassuming, Kermit the Frog. Don't be fooled by his gentle demeanor, for this Muppet's amphibian agility and leadership skills are renowned. With a charismatic croak, he's prepared to jump into the fray with the courage that only a show-hosting frog can muster.

Next, we have the glamorous and formidable Miss Piggy. The martial-arts-loving diva enters the arena with a fabulous flourish to the tune of 'Flawless', her purple gloves gleaming under the neon lights. A hush descends upon the audience as she takes her place in the ring, her warm-up 'hi-yahs' echoing with an intimidating undertone.

Fozzie Bear ambles in next, his signature hat and polka-dot tie giving him a lovable yet comedic air. This jovial jokester may be all laughs outside the ring, but within it, the bear can use his humour as an unsuspecting weapon, ready to disarm the competition with an unexpected punch(line).

Finally, we have Gonzo, the daredevil who is not only comfortable with chaos but invites it. His unique blue physique and penchant for thrill-seeking make him a wild card. With the unpredictable "whatever" species that Gonzo represents, the other Muppets had best prepare for the unexpected.

Ding, ding! Round one begins. Kermit, ever the diplomat, tries to initiate a pre-bout discussion. But Miss Piggy, not having any of that, launches herself at the frog with a kung-fu fury. Kermit leaps, evading her with an impressive froggy flip that leaves the audience cheering.

Fozzie, meanwhile, attempts to lighten the tension with a barrage of jokes. But when one of his quips accidentally lands on Gonzo's pride, the blue Muppet retaliates with a rapid chase around the ring, each missed swipe accompanied by a squeaky honk from his rubber chicken.

In the melee, Kermit displays his strategic skills, using his leap-and-dodge tactics to avoid the fierce Miss Piggy. But the diva, undeterred, is relentless, launches a well-aimed karate chop at her amphibian adversary, Kermit. The impact sends the frog sailing across the ring, landing in a heap of froggy fluff. Piggy, caught in the thrill of the battle, takes a moment to realize what she's done.

Seeing Kermit sprawled out, Miss Piggy's heart clenches. She remembers the countless duets sung, the tender moments shared on the set of The Muppet Show, and the enduring love beneath all their banter. The wrestling ring fades around her as she rushes over to her fallen frog, her fighting spirit replaced with concern.

She cradles Kermit's felt body, her eyes softening. "Oh, Kermie," she murmurs, her voice thick with affection. The crowd falls silent, watching this unexpected interlude unfold. A slow handclap starts to permeate from the crowd, a growing number of them keener for blood than the love-fest that is unfolding before their eyes. But Miss Piggy, the once fierce femme fatale, appears transformed by love into a nurturing figure.

Gently, she caresses Kermit's green cheek, her heart pounding in her plush chest. Her gaze is intense, her thoughts filled with the fond memories of their past. Kermit blinks his bulbous eyes open, and their eyes lock. The spark that ignites between them is electric, the air charged with a tension that is no longer about the fight. Gonzo and Fozzie stand perplexed; is the bout over?

Piggy leans in, her snout nearing Kermit's lips. The wrestling ring transforms into a romantic stage, and the audience, now split, deviates between holding its collective breath and booing the site they see before them. As two tiny puppet bodies lean into the intimacy, their past disagreements are momentarily forgotten in the magnetism of the moment.

However, the romance is cut short by a whirling streak of blue fur. Gonzo, with a scream of "FUCK THIS SHIT!" seizes his opportunity and strikes Miss Piggy on the back of her head with a rubber chicken. The crowd gasps, but the karate-chopping diva merely blinks, momentarily stunned. Then, with a fiery "HI-YAH!", she whirls around and sends Gonzo sailing out of the ring, her piggy prowess once again in full display.

The confused and still uncertain Fozzie tries to return to his puns and one-liners, but they are now merely distracting chatter, causing both Kermit and Miss Piggy to lose focus of their tender embrace and setting their combined sites to shutting the brown furry one's mouth once and for all. The on-off couple storm toward Fozzie with a combined clothesline move. Seeing an opportunity, Gonzo leaps back in the ring and launches himself at them from behind, knocking them, and Fozzie, into a tangled pile of felt and fur.

The ring is a spectacle of Muppet mayhem. Gonzo, embracing the chaos, uses his oddball antics to further bewilder his opponents by pounding up and down on Piggy's ample tummy. But the ever-resilient, and blinded by love Kermit uses this to his advantage, swiftly hopping onto the daredevil's back and wrapping both those amphibian legs around Gonzo's neck until he loses consciousness.

Scrambling to his feet, Fozzie, in his own well-meaning way, attempts to defuse the situation with more of his comedic chatter. However, the tension escalates, as Miss Piggy, with a frustrated "HI-YAH!", sends Fozzie flying out of the ring, with Kermit caught in the crossfire knocked into the corner in a haze of confusion (love is painful sometimes).

Before the femme fatale notices her actions, the bell dings and the ref raises an arm. There is only one Muppet remaining standing in the ring: Miss Piggy. Her intense determination, martial arts prowess, and, yes, her fabulousness, have triumphed. As she stands in the center of the ring, the crowd rises in applause, chanting her name in honor of the Muppet queen.

And so, the Puppet Wrestling Federation Battle Royale crowns another champion: Miss Piggy, the karate-chopping diva herself. Despite the valiant efforts of the other Muppets, none could surpass the force that is Piggy. They played their parts admirably, providing us with an unforgettable spectacle of Muppet magnificence.

As Miss Piggy stands victorious, she scans the ring for her beloved Kermit. Spotting him sat in the corner of the ring, she saunters over, her victory strut morphing into a sultry swagger. Kermit, ever the gent, rises to congratulate her, his green cheeks flushed with a blush only Miss Piggy could provoke. The chemistry between the two is palpable, turning the previously aggressive arena into a stage for a more tantalizing kind of match. Even those hard-hearted audience members would not deny these two their moment of embrace now.

Piggy wraps her purple-gloved arm around Kermit, pulling him close. "Oh, Kermie," she coos, the affection in her voice echoing around the arena. The crowd falls silent, their attention shifting from the earlier mayhem to the unexpected puppet romance unfolding before their eyes.

With Kermit in her embrace, Miss Piggy turns the tables, her victory in the ring becoming a conquest of the heart. The frog, who once leapt to evade her strikes, now finds himself the subject of a different kind of pursuit.

Miss Piggy gently places a hand under Kermit's chin, tilting his face towards her. Their eyes meet, and in that moment, the wrestling arena fades into the background. The scent of faux fur and felt fills the air as Miss Piggy leans in, her eyelashes fluttering. Kermit, caught in her gaze, gulps nervously, his eyes wide. "Oh, Piggy," he whispers, his voice quivering.

Piggy moves closer, the space between them charged with a tension that rivals the earlier puppet pandemonium. They are locked in a dance of desire, their puppet hearts pounding in rhythm. This will be a day long remembered for it is rare that a love story is celebrated in an arena of felt and foam, under the neon lights of the Puppet Wrestling Federation.

In the end, it's a reminder that underestimating anyone, especially a karate-kicking pig, is a grave mistake. Whether that's in love or war. For now, let's revel in the glory of our Muppet champion, and look forward to the next incredible PWF bout.

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