Lost In Translation: Foreign Movie Posters That Make No Sense! - Warped Factor - Words in the Key of Geek.

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Lost In Translation: Foreign Movie Posters That Make No Sense!

Take a look at your average movie poster. It might feature an actor or two, it might include a tagline, review or quote, or it might be a bit atmospheric. The basic function though is to give a general sense of awareness of an upcoming movie, whilst also giving you a hint of what it's about and conveying the tone of the film. Hopefully appealing to the intended audience of what it's promoting.

But it seems that sometimes when films are sold abroad to non-English speaking countries the whole concept of 'attracting the intended audience through poster advertising' is lost. And occasionally what might have been, for instance, a fun film suitable for all the family is turned into some kind of dystopian nightmare. Take for example...

Short Circuit (Czech Republic)
Johnny 5, brought to you by Skynet, has come alive and is going to murder you in your sleep with his cybernetic robot skeleton arm.

If family-friendly feel-good films can be depicted as something quite disturbing, what do you think exported horror movies might be advertised like?...

Cujo (Africa) 
So what do we have here then? Circa 1980s Princess Margaret and 1:2 size Princess Diana taking their cross-breed basset hound to the park for fun and frolics... and maybe occasional maulings? Perfect family viewing.

Admittedly, there is a hint of blood on the dog's mouth, but that could equally be strawberry sauce where tiny Princess Di shared her ice cream with her "good boy". Also, the dog looks absolutely nothing like Cujo, it's certainly not a St. Bernard is it?

Talking of characters who look nothing like they're supposed to...

Star Wars (Russia)
I'm guessing that perhaps this is an artist's interpretation of the Death Star and what was under Darth Vader's helmet??? Even if it is that it, quite frankly, looks more like Darkseid from the DC Comics Universe standing under a glitter ball! Well, the original Star Wars did come out in 1977 during the heady days of disco. Perhaps the former prince of Apokolypse is partial to a bit of Donna Summer?

Maybe we should forgive the Russian advertising executives for messing up this poster. After all, at the time of its release who would've thought the quirky space western would become so popular. Obviously six years later when the world had Star Wars fever and the second sequel arrived they'd get it spot on, right?...

Star Wars: Return Of The Jedi (Russia)
I mean, come on! What the hell? I just don't even know.

Perhaps these creatures were in one of George's special editions?

As for that other popular franchise the Bearded One was involved with...

Raiders Of The Lost Arc (Poland) 
Well there are Nazis on it, so at least that's on-point. But they seem to have developed some kind of stealth drone-bomber or something, and Indy's not having anything like that so he's sorta turned Rambo, commandeered a u-boat with a semi-automatic weapon, and is sailing down the Nile to take care of them. You remember that scene, right?

All round this looks more like Cannonball Run: European Madness than anything related to Indiana Jones.

Surely nothing else Poland could come up with could outdo the bizareness of the above Raiders poster?

"Hold my Żubrówka", says Poland...

The Godfather (Poland)
Well played Poland, well played.

A man and a gun drawn with a Sharpie and a long-before-its-time Facebook dislike button on. Lady's and gentlemen it's The Godfather. One of the greatest moments of cinematic history boiled down to "shooting people is bad".

Peter Pan (Croatia)
You know how Walt Disney are known for the groundbreaking animation? Well this was when they were going through their Lowry phase.

King Kong (Belgium)
King Kong fights a giant anaconda, strangles Jaws (or perhaps he just has an oversized Jaws plushy?) and raises the Titanic!!! Tell me you don't want to see this film?

Now, I've saved what I think is the best for last - in that it really does not make any sense to me whatsoever! 10 points are on offer for anyone who can guess what film this poster is advertising without reading the corner text...

Ghostbusters (Czech Republic)
Yeah, right. Never in a million years would you put that down as Ghostbusters if it didn't have Bill Murray, Dan Aykroyd etc written in the top corner. Unless you speak Czech that is.

Is that supposed to be Gozer? Surely not?? Perhaps that's a marshmallow on the nose of whatever that creature is though? Could that be some kind of Stay Puft reference? But then it also appears to have cupcakes for eyes, a Nespresso coffee pod on its ear and a thin wooden penis, so I suspect the 'marshmallow' is pure coincidence.

I've credited both this Salvador Dali/Terry Gilliam-esque Ghostbusters poster and the Short Circuit one at the top of the page to the Czech Republic, but in actuality both originated back in the 80s before Czechoslovakia was dissolved. I don't know if the Slovaks confusion over WHAT THE HELL IS GOING ON HERE fueled the dissolution, but could we blame them?

These are our favourite foreign movie posters that make no sense, but the world's a big place so perhaps there are even more bizarre ones out there. We will keep looking...

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